Monday, September 30, 2013

Starting over

I've had a lot of stress in the last two months, financially, emotionally, and at first I dealt with it in a good way, working out every chance I got.  Then things started piling up and I had to get my family ready for vacation.  I stopped going to the gym, stopped doing evening walks, any extra time was spent with my ass planted on my couch, decompressing.  I was down about 15 pounds and feeling really good about myself before all this happened.

Well vacation is over and fall is upon us and those things I was stressing about?  They’re not real problems. There’s a someecards that reads, “I’ve got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up in my mind.”  Yup, that was me.  The husband and I discussed this last night, how I've been taking it all in the past few weeks and shutting everyone out.  He recognized it, but didn't know what to do, he wasn't stressed about it and couldn't understand why I was (that’s what I DO honey…).

It’s gotten to the point that about a week and a half ago the temperature dropped and I embraced getting to wear long sleeved shirts or sweaters (read: bulky) to work.  Last week I asked some friends who have been successful in the weight loss department what has given them their motivation.  I was hoping that something would spark me.  I got a lot of great answers, but nothing stood out to me and I knew that evening I’d be sitting on the couch drinking my umpteenth glass of Cherry Coke and sneaking a Reese’s peanut butter cup or Chips Ahoy chewy cookie and thinking about how depressed I was that my son will be 2 in November and I’m still wearing my maternity pants because they’re comfortable and don’t hurt my waist.  That STILL wasn't enough to motivate me, what is wrong with me?  Then as I’m sitting here at work, I typed a report of a woman who passed away.  She was in her 50’s and her husband found her unresponsive in their living room from the night before.  She was overweight, had heart problems and had fell asleep downstairs, where she passed away.  I NEVER want my husband or sons to find me that way and if I can do anything to prevent it, it’s getting my weight under control.  I had been looking for a sign and when I typed that report, I finally felt something.

I've been counting calories and points since Thursday and will be starting back to Weight Watchers meetings officially this afternoon.  My weight last Wednesday was 238, but I’ll have an official weight later today after my meeting and go with that from now on.

Here’s today’s meals and snacks:
B:  Whole grain toast with a tsp of butter, an egg, a slice of ham and a slice of Muenster cheese (7)

B:  Coffee once I get to work (3)

L:  Pumpkin Sausage Pasta with Roasted Broccoli (10)

S:  ½ an apple (0)

S:  Sargento reduced fat Colby cheese stick (2)

S:  Hard boiled egg (2)

D:  Italian wonderpot (bucatini pasta with tomatoes, spinach and feta) and skim milk (11)

I get 35 points per day and that equals 35 points.

I also worked out today, jogging and walking intervals for 30 minutes at the gym.
That’s all for now!